Several weeks ago, I asked our youngest daughter Emily (17) if she wanted to go to San Diego with me in mid-November. I had some frequent flyer miles, and it would be fun to combine doing a seminar with seeing the west coast. She was excited about it, but said if their hockey team made “states” she wouldn’t be able to go. Yesterday, they made states so I thought she’d not be able to go, but at the game another parent said, “Not necessarily. The date of your trip is only if they make the upper level at states.”
Emily playing at the game where her team made states:
When I got home, I told Emily, “I just found out that even though you’ve made states, you still might be able to go to California.” Emily snapped back, wondering why I was so hung up on going to San Diego. I was upset because she belittled our trip. I told her I was dissappointed and angry that she cared so little about going. We had the beginnings of a good quarrel going.
Then I started wondering. Why did she respond that way? Previously, she’d expressed excitement about going. I asked her, “Emily, why did you say that about our trip? You seemed like you wanted to go.” She said, “Well, I want our team to win at states. You made it seem like you didn’t want us to win.”
Oh. I blew it. I got angry before I incarnated. I reacted before I tried to understand. I was struck by the difference between me and Jesus in Mark 3 with the crippled man. Jesus could have been angry with the Pharisees and their judgemental spirit in trying to catch him healing on the Sabbath. Instead, Jesus takes the time to incarnate with the Pharisees by asking them what they would do if their sheep fell into a pit on the Sabbath. Wouldn’t they haul the sheep out? Isn’t this man with the crippled left hand more valuable than the sheep?
Jesus does a double incarnation. He incarnates with the Pharisees to try to get them to incarnate with this crippled man. He ignores their judgemental spirit and tries to reach their hearts by way of their mind. But their hearts are hard. They refuse to say that this man is more valuable than a sheep. Jesus responds with grief that overflows into anger.
Jesus first incarnated and then he got angry. Just the opposite of me. Because he incarnated first, his anger was appropriate. The only thing he did according to Mark was “look at them with anger”. My anger was an overreaction because I hadn’t taken the time to understand. Don’t we have a wonderful Savior?